I live in the suburbs, and I actually do like it. The town I live in is about 60,000 people in population, and is becoming more and more affluent and a tad bit more diverse. However, if you average all the incomes out, I'd say it's mainly middle to upper middle. Guess what we are???
At any rate, our town is pretty white bread, if you know what I mean, but with a mosque recently being built, we have seen more middle easterners coming to live. Now I have said before, that we've had mainly positive experiences. Actually, the family on the corner is very nice, and they even named their 2 week old baby an American name. So there you go. Our middle-eastern neighbors are mainly Palestinian or Jordanian in descent, and seem to be more liberal. Our backyard neighbors seem to describe what we've seen best. The wearing of abayas and scarves seems to be a generational thing. The older the woman is the more she tends to cover. It has been an education for me, I tell you! Being a teacher, I have taught many middle-eastern students. I have always welcomed the mothers, never met any fathers, to bring food in or anything else that would demonstrate their culture. Because of this, I would have families request to have me as their teacher. I found if I welcomed a middle-eastern family, and showed that I was indeed interested in learning about their culture, I was welcomed in as almost one of the family. As an example, I couldn't believe when I received not only a gift on Halloween, but a gift for Easter! I have had very positive experiences with the women of this culture. I wish I could say the same about the men.
Now I have told you that I never met any of the fathers, but I had talked with a few over the phone. I could tell that I was not as well thought of by them as by their female relations. I knew it had nothing to do with me as a person; it was because I was a woman. I am not going to lie to you all, and tell you the only time I have ever experienced dicrimination it was by an Arab man, because that is not true. I also have learned my American history enough to know that this country had a negative attitude toward women for a very long time, and to a certain extent it still does. That angers me. I cannot stand being told I can't do something simply because I'm a woman. I had a really hard time when I was younger and told I couldn't do something because I was a girl. My brother was able to drive my parents' cars without any problem. He could also stay out later. Because I was female, certain 'things' could happen to me that couldn't happen to my brother. I understand that, however, there are ways to make going out safer. It just bugged me, and made me want to do it all the more, which when I was older, I did. I went to the Southside Chicago bars, and stayed out late always WITH friends. We never let each other go home with any guy. We also used to go to Wrigleyville to hear bands. Once I was intoxicated, boyfriend and I just separated, and a singer in the band was hitting on me. I was only 21, and let's just say he was not. He was a bit too old for me. My friends knew I shouldn't let him take me home, and they didn't let me get into his car. We watched each other's backs like that.
So when I started encountering the Arab male, and was given information about cultural values etc. from my place of employment, I must admit, I was not impressed. To me it smacked of things past, but worse. Let me say this. I am not your stereotypical stay-at-home mother. Hubby even said he believed he would enjoy it more than I, was better suited for it, but as a teacher I couldn't afford to support the family. I am so not domestic. I hate cooking!!! I like a clean house, but cleaning sucks. I have volunteered my time, but staying home and doing
only that while my kids are in school just seems stifling to me. My neighbor loves it; I would hate it. So you can imagine how I felt when I was treated like a servant, someone beneath these fathers, when I have a degree and was using it to teach their children. The woman were accepting and welcoming of me; the men were not.
I know this will sound juvenile, but whenever I know I'll encounter a 'few' of these Arabian male neighbors, I wear the shortest shorts I own. Yah, I know, real mature! I guess it's my way of sticking it to the man, so to speak. Just yesterday, I had to go to the kitchen to get something after I was already laying in bed. I was warm, so I was only wearing my underwear. The window coverings on the back door were not down, nor was I going to ask hubby to get up and close them. Nope. I walked mostly naked in my kitchen in front of the sliding french doors and a window. I've done this before, and if this was one of my other neighbors I probably wouldn't. But it's not. So as I walked across the kitchen, I felt empowered. I thought, if it's against your culture for me to do this, then don't look! Just so you know, though, I'm not being discriminatory. I'd do this to any man who told me I was below him in worth. So if you see some woman in short shorts with her ankles defintely on show, or if you see said woman dancing naked in her kitchen, then you'll know it's me.
Myth#43: A women's place is in the home. Nope, it's in the boardroom, or classroom or anywhere she'd like it to be. We are strong, we are smart, and damn it, WE just may rule the world one day. So you crazy fu***, look out, or we may ask YOU to do something demeaning some day.
Attempt#1 (Above)---I groomed my little Shih-Tzu for the first time. Notice how scalped she looked! She was so cold, and I felt so badly for her.
Attempt #2---A few days ago I gave grooming Maddy another whirl. I'd say she looks much better this time around!
