I don't want to sound like an old fogey around here, but when did kids lose the ability to occupy themselves for more than a few minutes? I'm serious! Today we were watching my brother's kids for the day. Their ages are 10 1/2, 9 and 5. Please know that I love my brother and his family very much. It's just that the kids are never happy. I believe my neighbor coined this term for today's generation: the 'How Are You Going to Entertain Me Today Generation'. Oh, we all were told that Kurt Cobain's anthem 'Smells Like Teen Spirit' summed up our selfish, narcissitic Gen X, but I think it applies more to today's generation of kids.
I used to worry that my niece's and nephew wouldn't like me anymore if I didn't do something special with them every time they were put in my care. I have baked countless cookies, bought lunches and dinners, painted nails, bought makeup and spent too much money at 'Libby Lu' all in the name of wanting to satisfy them. You see I always was the cool aunt. I had children later than any of their other aunts, and then I had boys. Meaning: my nephew had to school me in all things boy and my nieces were the ones who I do 'girly things' with. My oldest niece actually was happy when we found out we were having another boy. Too cute. I used to really like doing things with them, but as they've grown older they began exhausting me. Having two of my own children makes me tired, so tired that at times I can't think of anything I'd like better than to not have to be with any kids.
I'm trying to get my boys to learn to play on their own. S. always has, but there are times when he wants me to play and all I want to do is to sleep! I don't expect to not spend any time with my kids. I really do enjoy spending time with them, but I do not want them to expect me to entertain them all day. When I was teaching, and even now, I see so many kids who are signed up for way too many things. They are in soccer, baseball or softball, basketball, karate, and the list goes on....! If there are two or more kids in the family, I wonder just how their parents manage to get them to all of these activities. The kids are stressed, mom and dad are stressed, and the kids only succeed in learning that if there's not an organized activity that day, then they will surely be bored.
I'm not opposed to sports or art classes. Quite the opposite. I myself was in ballet and tap dance, gymnastics, 4-H as well as one summer of ill-suited softball. My brother was in baseball, basketball, floor hockey, and boy scouts. And we both took swim lessons. However, we did not do any of these activities at the same time. There was time for homework, family dinners and time to be bored. Bored to the point where we had to make our own fun. Those 'activities' remain some of my favorites. Now I know that I told my mom I was bored. I know that. I also know, though, that she didn't come up with things for me to 'do' so I wasn't bored anymore, unless you count her 'chore chart'. Come to think of it, I think that is one reason why we didn't say that awful phrase more often. If I was bored, my mother would find something for me to do in the way of chores. There were always plenty of them she said.
What do you all think? Are there too many organized activities? Do kids today not know how to entertain themselves? Tell me what you think.
3 comments:
Most youth of today are certainly in way too many activities at one time. How can they excel if they have 10 things going on at once? But, to that end, some kids thrive better in that type of environment; i.e., because of being Adhd, etc. I know that too many times though, that it can be a copout for some kids...that they just don't want to have to deal with some "down time".
I had to teach my kids when they were younger that it's not going to hurt them to have some down time; to take some time to read and be by themselves.
Hope this answers your question. Are you doing well?? We haven't communicated in a long while.
Sandi P.
I think technology is to blame, kids have cell phones now, gaming systems, internet, computer, soccer etc. I REFUSE to sign my daughter up for activites that I would have to take her to and organize my schedule around it.
My daughter does gymnastics and that's it. No soccer, baseball, softball etc. My daughter does have a great imagination and tons of toys. I do not play with her, sometime daddy plays dolls with her but i don't. I want my down time and that's not being selfish. I often tell her now you have x amount of time to play before bed, I recommend you play. I let her watch tv too. Kids are too grown up these days.
Did I ever say, I HATE cell phones. They cost too much money and why can't what ever wait until you get home. The people at walmart do not care if you got busy last night or didn't pay your child support. Take the drama home and keep it there. I hate when I'm conversing and people put me on hold to take a call. I think it's rude, it happens all the time in stores and businesses. You can miss a call and life will still continue.
I hate libby liu, the stores are so not worth the money. Princess wants her 7th birthday there, Not.
Thanks Sandi and Jen! I agree with you both. Sandi, you brought up an interesting point about ADHD. And you are right about the children who suffer from that. And Jen, yep, technology certainly hasn't helped!
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