Life Should Really Be This Way

Yesterday in Chi Town, we were treated to the most delightful weather since, according to channel 7, November 4th. It got to 73 degrees, and it was sunny! Plus, the Irish bloke who owns the brick laying company that put in our brick patio last fall, was due to arrive for an estimate when the tot was sleeping. Can you imagine? I only had one child to deal with while trying to talk about what I wanted within inches. The cool thing is that our neighbor is having the same man/company come to do the same type of work, so we were told we'd get a deal if we did ours at the same time. Being the pessimist I can be about such things, I decided to believe it when I saw it. I had a number in my head that I prayed the work would be under, but believed it probably wouldn't be, and had a plan B already in place.

***I promise to be brief here, so as not to put anyone to sleep! When we bought our home, we knew we were going to have to replace the whole front stoop and walkway. There is no way around it; the concrete is cracked all the way to the bottom. Also, we took down the deck/screened-in porch off the back, and me being post-partum and all, had a tiny brick patio laid. Instantly, when the work was completed, we knew it was too small. I told the Irish man that, and he and I set up an appt. for the spring estimate. Anyway, everything is going to look so cool! And the estimate is almost $2,000.00 under what I had prayed it would be!!! Also, having had this company do work for myself and the neighbor before, I know it is going to be quality work. The biggest reason why it's such a good price? Because our neighbors and us are doing big jobs at the same time. Oh, and I cut a deal. Don't ask, don't tell.... Unfortunately, not THAT kind of a deal, although my neighbor and I refer to him as a hottie. And seriously, who doesn't love an accent? The guy was born in Ireland, raised in England. So it's a combination of two of my favorite accents. Okay, I've bored you!***

It was just one of those days where everything seemed to be right in the world. I finally went through my mother's wallet, and it brought me comfort and smiles, not tears. I also went through a box of things she saved from our childhood. Again, more smiles and laughter. I even was told by my therapist that she was moving to Las Vegas, and I did okay!!! BTW, MB you are getting a fabulous woman. Not saying that you need therapy or anything. I think she'd make a good friend, and I am going to miss her. I have felt the most even that I have felt in years. Even my therapist commented on how good I have been doing and for how long. I haven't yelled at S. I do the whole 'get down to your child's level and speak firmly, yet evenly' thing. And you know what? It works! I find if I get angry, his behavior escalates. Who knew? Well, I DID know that, but sometimes it can be hard to do the right thing. I have been even using a chart, don't roll your eyes, and he earns a non-monetary reward if he hits his weekly goal. Tomorrow we are going to the library, just the two of us. This is the fourth week of better behavior. Better, not perfect, is what we're striving for. I'm being realistic. This week, we're adding 'getting dressed by yourself' to the chart. He seems excited about it now that it's 'on the chart'.
People, I even did fine with my dad getting engaged last weekend. It feels weird, but she has been so good for my dad. The only creepy thing is that she has the same first name as my mom. I think the kids are going to be confused, but we'll do our best. We'll all adjust.

Today I felt so good that I was stopping to pretty much let every pedestrian cross the street in front of me instead of saying to myself, 'Why don't you look before you cross the street, damn it!' It started raining just a few hours ago. My MIL is due to return from the south before Easter, not sure the day, so I'm sure my even mood will be tested. Is it fitting that the sky has opened up and poured tons of rain down and that the wind is blowing so hard you can hear it whistle? Yep. The April storms are arriving in more than one fashion. Hubby's aunt and uncle are due to come over to see the boys. Every time they travel, his aunt buys tons of things for the kids that they mostly neither need nor want. Many times she doesn't even realize that she has bought duplicates or that a toy is not appropriate for a certain age level. Goodwill must love us. Anyway, they haven't been to see the boys since right before Christmas. Hubby, as you know, has been working a lot, so we haven't called, and if hubby doesn't call, well no one gets together. However, they did call this time; three months later. Yah, his family is so close. Can you tell?! Oh, the best part is that they live in the subdivision next to ours! I have literally walked the whole way there many times. Yah. This aunt is the sister of my FIL, and the one who always hosts Easter. She's also a crier who makes a big deal out of nothing. So you can guess how she's going to take the news that we're not going there for Easter. Good times, I tell you! My therapist said the proof of how destructive hubby's parents have been to hubby and I is clear now that we've had 6 months without them. We are both so much happier, our marriage stronger. We rarely fight; I mean not just bickering like we all do. Hubby is remembering things he wish he didn't about his childhood and his parents. I don't bring them up; I just listen, which I can do now that I am healthy. The anger is gone. The house is happier. Mama's not losing her mind, and dada's not afraid to tell mama the latest request by his family because now that we don't talk, there are NO requests. 'It's the end of the world as we know it, and I feel fine!' REM, 1987... INDEED!!!
I really feel like this should be the end. Girl has infertility. Girl gets through it and has baby. Girl suffers with PPD. Girl's mom dies. Girl grieves. Girl can't get pregnant again. Girl finally does after becoming a human pin-cushion. BabyB dies, but baby A is healthy and beautiful. Girl suffers from PPD. Girl's ILs make huge scene at the baby's christening. Girl's husband decides enough is enough. PPD gets better. Children thrive. Girl makes a firm decision which she feels in her heart is the right one. No more children. No more negativity. Peace. Fade out......If only life was really that way. That you start in one place, and then there is a clear end. An end of the turmoil. Now life can start. I have my hubby. I have my babies. I feel good. Now it's time to start enjoying it all. But life isn't that way. Enjoy the little things each day. Tomorrow might be a bad day. Who knows? But today is good, and that's all I'm going to worry about...for now.