As I was picking up the Tot on Sunday from our church's nursery, I saw the most beautiful little girl baby. I asked the attendant who she belonged to, and she said she was a foster child of one of our church's families. They take in children whose parents are being counselled on parenting skills and will be receiving their child back, and those children whose parents rights are being severed. These babies have either been physically abused or their mother is a drug addict. Lovely, eh?
Guys, when she looked at me with her huge blue eyes, I fell in love right there. This is NOT like me. I've been dreaming of adopting her. I've researched county adoptions, and I couldn't believe how cheap they are, and all of the support you receive from the county for taking these children. They are considered 'special needs' children, so they often will give you some financial support if needed. We wouldn't need that. Anyway, after closing the door to adoption because of its cost, or the travel involved, my heart seems to be considering it again. I don't know if it's right for us, but when I saw those little eyes I melted. And a little girl to boot! I'm not getting my hopes up, because for one thing I don't know her situation. She may not be adoptable. The county likes to do everything in its power to 'preserve' the biological family. Her mother is probably in rehab. detoxing, and when she is done, she'll likely get her back. I just think of the life she could have with us, and the life she will likely have with her mother. It makes me sad. I don't even know how to go about finding out her situation, and what we would need to do anyway if she were to be adoptable. I mean, we'd likely need a home study, physicals, that sort of thing I know. But we haven't even begun the process, so how could we even get her? Does anyone have any experience in county adoptions?
***I talked with someone in the know tonight, and it appears the baby girl is going back to her mother, as well as the other child who was beaten so badly she's blind. I understand wanting to preserve the family, but only to a point. When the situation is so dangerous for these children, I wonder who are they doing this for? And the drug-addicted mothers? I'm sorry, but the relapse rate is what...Yeah. But hey, they're with their biological mothers! I hope those who created the system can sleep at night. I know I couldn't.
5 comments:
Sorry I don't have any experience but I just wanted to say that I completely understand where you're coming from. I have also fallen in love with several babies/kids who were in terrible situations in the past. I wanted to rescue them and give them a better life. Sure, I am not rich but I can offer so much more than their biolgical parents ever can, especially the unconditional love they deserve. Hubby and I have always talked about adoption and we may still pursue that in the future.
I hope the best for that little baby girl you saw and that she will end up in a loving home.
My mom and did receiving care through our church after their last child was born. We had a newborn girl, who we nicknamed "CC" for her chubby cheeks. We had her for about 2 weeks, and evidently, begged my parents to keep her. However, she was just with us while being transition from her birth mom to being placed with her adopted family. After she was gone, my sisters and I didn't really think much about it.
I mentioned it to my mom a while back, and she said, even now, some 21 years later, she thinks of CC every single day and wonders how she is.
I'm a frequent reader, never posted before, but I just have to encourage you NOT to give up! God put you in a situation where you encountered this sweet baby girl and her big blue eyes for a reason. You're right though...the system simply sucks and the biological family only deserves to be perserved to a point. Hang in there, but follow your heart. My thoughts and prayers are with you!
Megan in Atlanta
I say go for it - don't give up on adoption if that is what is pulling at your heart strings.
I'm sure you won't regret it!
Sorry Bev - that last comment was from me...
Sandi P.
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