Friday, October 05, 2007

Coming Clean

After nearly six weeks of trying to figure it out on my own, I finally talked to Hubby about possibly adoption a third child. I have to tell you, I was so nervous that I almost couldn't get the words out. I can't tell you how surprised I was when Hubby took it so well, and we actually had a very good conversation about it. We discussed both of our concerns: how the boys would do with it, if we have enough space, possible health and behavioral concerns, age and ethnicity that we are comfortable with, and of course whether or not we would financially be able to give all three children a good life. We decided that we are fine with a hispanic child, as baby girl is, or a bi-racial caucasion/hispanic.

My therapist asked me this week what the difference between an agency adoption and a private adoption. When I explained, she said to me that she knew someone who is looking to place a child. Hubby feels much more comfortable with this idea as we would know more about the mother's health. I told him that a county adoption would cost us about $2,000 with lawyers fees included in that amount. Then I told him that a private adoption could cost us well over $20, 000-$30,000. He told me not to worry about the money, that we would find a way if this is what we are meant to do. I really don't think a private adoption would work out anyway, and I cannot get my hopes up about it at all.

I have decided to take my time thinking about this. Thinking about whether this is what we should do or not. Adopting a child would make a huge change to our lives. Also, even though we certainly not wealthy, it would change our lifestyle big time. So, I have decided to pray about it, and see what happens. I don't feel the anxiety over waiting too long like I did with the infertility, which is really nice. At any rate, does anyone have any experience with adoption with the exception of international adoption. That is the one where we actually know people who have done it. I know I do not want to do an international adoption, too. So if you have adopted domestically, whether through an agency or through your state, please leave a comment about how that all went. It would really help our decision-making process!

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Oh!!! I am so excited for you!!!! I can't wait to read how this all unfolds!

Val

Sue said...

Wow, what an amazing thing to consider! Very, very special.